What Chemistry Really Is
Chemistry has a purpose. It's not random.
It's not a fluke.
There's essential information in the attraction that occurs between two people.
I've often heard people talk about chemistry as if it's a bad thing. Like we should be fearful of the people we're attracted to the most. And I understand why people feel this way:
Because the people we're highly attracted to tend to bring our issues to the surface.
It's true... strong attraction makes for a wild ride in love. But the question is: Is this really a bad thing?
Some people will say yes.
Sure, if you want life to be easy then the path of strong attraction isn't for you (Side note: Is there an easy path? I'm still trying to figure that one out).
Of course, we all want love to be uncomplicated. But we are complicated! So why would our relationships be anything less?
In my opinion, it's natural for love with another to be a wild ride. This doesn't mean that we stick around in relationships that are abusive or feel horrible to be in.
It means we recognize that relationships will provoke us to grow into the truest expression of ourselves!! And this this process isn't always easy!
Feelings such as of insecurity, doubt, fear, jealousy, judgement, and contempt (all ego feelings) will appear with the people we desire the most. Because of this, many of us categorize these highly-attractive relationships as "bad" or "unhealthy."
However spiritually speaking, these relationships are doing what they're supposed to do - they're provoking your ego to surface so you can transform it.
When we remember that relationships are meant to help us grow, we approach the "bad" that arises very differently. We know that there is a lesson in every challenge - and that lesson always is to regain a connection to love.
Lessons of love take on many different forms...
Sometimes reconnecting with love means leaving the relationship. Sometimes reconnecting with love means sticking around and to work through the challenges.
Sometimes the lesson is learning to forgive your partner. Sometimes the lesson is learning to forgive yourself.
Yes, we all want peace in relationships; they're supposed to be blissful and loving. And when they're not, we know we've fallen into illusion and it's time get back on track.
This beautiful process is a dance. It's how we deepen in Love.
It's how we remember, yet again, who we really are.
Don't bypass or downplay the chemistry you feel; remember it exists for a reason. The people you are most attracted to are your greatest teachers in love. Show up for the lessons they have for you.
Please leave a comment below about what you've learned from your relationships with the most chemistry. I look forward to hearing from you.